Starbucks Requests No Guns in Their Stores: In an open letter posted on the firm's website, Howard Schultz, the chief executive of Starbucks, is asking customers of the coffee chain to honor a request to no longer bring guns into its stores. I can sort of understand where the gun owners are coming from though. Sometimes you just need an extra “shot” in your cappuccino.
Public Masturbation Ruled Legal in Sweden: In a landmark decision, a 65-year-old man who was charged with sexual assault after taking off his shorts and masturbating into the ocean near Stockholm, has been acquitted after a judge ruled that he was not targeting a specific person. In related news, Pee Wee Herman just announced plans to move to Sweden.
Travel Magazine Encourages Shroom Consumption: Arizona Highways, Arizona’s “award-winning” travel magazine published an article encouraging travelers to check out the edible fly agaric mushroom, a mushroom that when eaten raw, has unpredictable psychedelic effects. Publishers say their only intent was to help people who may be traveling in the area to really enjoy their “trip.”
Former CIA/NSA Director Says Terrorists Use Gmail: Former NSA and CIA director Michael Hayden recently told a gathering that “Gmail” is the preferred online mail service for terrorists. Really? I would have assumed they use “Jihad Mail.”
North Carolina Soldier and Wife Arrested for Dog Porn: A North Carolina soldier and his wife have been arrested and charged with multiple counts of crimes against nature involving bestiality after their videos appeared online showing sex acts with dogs. I assume the video was a remake of “Lassie Cum Home.” Anyway, the couple claims that the whole thing was nothing more than some “heavy petting,” but police are describing it as “ruff sex.”