Health & Fitness
Blog | Tigers in West Texas Zoo Involved in Deadly Love Triangle
A satirical look at current events!
Tigers in West Texas Zoo Involved in Deadly Love Triangle: Zoo officials say that female tiger has apparently killed her mate at a West Texas zoo in a rare attack that came after months of simmering jealousy in a feline love triangle. Authorities say if the allegations are proven, the tiger could spend the rest of her life behind bars.
Hitler’s Food Taster Tells All: Margot Woelk, Hitler’s last surviving food taster, has decided at age 95 to tell all about the two and a half years she spent as one of 15 young women who sampled the führer’s gourmet vegetarian dishes to insure that they weren’t poisoned. I assume this just wasn’t the kind of job situation where you could tell them “no thanks, I’m dieting.”
NYC Proposes New Minimum Age for Cigarette Sales: The New York City Council is considering a new measure that would up the legal age for purchasing cigarettes from 18 to 21. I think its shameful that teens are out there trying to buy cigarettes. Why back in my day, we just stole them from our parents.
Find out what's happening in Brentwoodwith free, real-time updates from Patch.
Brazilian Doctor Charged With Killing 7 Patients: According to a Health Ministry investigator, a female Brazilian doctor has been charged with killing seven patients in order to free up beds at a hospital intensive care unit. The doctor claimed she had no choice but to kill them because the overcrowded conditions were putting patients’ health at risk.
Find out what's happening in Brentwoodwith free, real-time updates from Patch.
North Korea Threatens Colorado Springs: North Korea is now threatening to attack Colorado Springs, but they apparently have no idea where Colorado Springs actually is - after a propaganda video showed the mountain city to be about 1,000 miles from where it actually is, putting it somewhere in Louisiana. Analysts say that to be that far off, they’d almost have to be getting their geography lessons from Sarah Palin.
Benefits of Estrogen Studied: A new study shows that estrogen appears to help protect women's memories from decline due to aging. Researchers found that women who were given estrogen were once again able to remember things that their husbands did years ago to piss them off and throw it all back in their faces.
Elvis Impersonator Released Over Poison Letters: A 45-year-old part-time Elvis impersonator has been arrested and released after having been accused of sending poison-filled letters to President Obama. His lawyer said his release came just before he was about to sing "Jailhouse Rock."
Hawaii Residents Less Stressed: For the third year in a row, Hawaii has snagged the No. 1 spot as the least stressed state, with Utah and Kentucky keeping their distinctions as the two most stressed U.S. states. In fact, Hawaii residents are so laid-back, about the only way you can stress them out is by telling them they may have to move to Utah or Kentucky.
